My menu of beliefs and philosophies isn’t complex. I dislike people who park backwards in spaces. I don’t believe anyone above the age of three is afraid of clowns. And I think people who own pit bulls are idiots.
If you’re reading this, and you own a pit bull, then I’m sorry. I’m insensitive. What I meant to say is, you’re not smart.
The basic argument for the ownership of pit bulls is that, in loving hands, the dogs are gentle companions. By the same reasoning, so is a jar of angry Africanized bees. But if I let my kids play with a jar of deadly bees, you bet there’d be some outrage, no?
When a pit bull rips off a toddler’s face with its insanely powerful jaws, the first thing pit bull owners claim is, “It’s not the dog’s fault!” If I’m the town Sheriff, then I agree in part. Because after I shoot your dangerous pit bull, I’m hauling the owner off to prison. Idiots Prison.
Vote for Angry Czeck, County Sheriff. I pledge to deport all pit bulls to France, where I hear they have had some success in transplanting human faces.
Sure, I’m no Jim Davis, but I am especially pleased with my green cloud of mustard gas (and the corresponding bones) on Panel 5. My only regret is the wording in Panel 4, which is confusing. Sorry.